Cinema Toast

June 21, 2006

New releases

THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS: TOKYO DRIFT (PG-13)

Lucas Black, Bow Wow, Nathalie Kelley, Sung Kang, Brian Tee, Zachary Ty Brian. Directed by Justin Lin.

Playing a testosterone-driven motorcycle racer, Zachary Ty Brian has doubled his size since he left the "Home Improvement" TV sitcom, but it doesn't matter. His character is just a setup to get Lucas Black shipped off to Japan where he can race bikes through Tokyo's neon-highlighted, rain-slick streets. As Tim the Toolman used to tell Zachary when he was little, the answer is, as always, "More power!"

2 and 1/2 pieces of sequel toast

GARFIELD (PG)

Breckin Meyer, Bill Murray, Liz Wilson. Directed by Tim Hill.

Shipped off to England, the lasagne-loving cat-with-an-attitude drawn by Jim Davis has been replaced by a Computer Generated character straight out of a kitty litter commercial. Trying hard, Bill Murray's voice is still no match for that of the late Lorenzo Music (Garfield's voice in the TV specials).

1 and 1/2 pieces of new kitty-litter flavor toast

THE LAKE HOUSE (PG)

Sandra Bullock, Keanu Reeves, Christopher Plummer.

Directed by Alejandro Agresti.

The two stars were much better riding a booby-trapped bus together. This time theÊChicago architecture out-acts the stars when Bullock moves into a beautifully designed house occupied two years ago by Reeves (or maybe he's the current resident and she's going to move in two years from now).Ê A magic mailbox allows the two to communicate with each other but we quickly realize we really donÕt care what they have to say.Ê

1 and 1/2 pieces of Chicago-style toast

WAH-WAH (R)

Gabriel Byrne, Emily Watson, Miranda Richardson, Julie Walters. Directed by Richard Grant.

Actor/writer/director Richard Grant (of "How to Get Ahead in Advertising" fame) was raised in semi-colonial Swaziland and his film of adulterous parents, an American stewardess stepmother, and cases of gin and tonic is based on fact. The strong cast and stunning photography only make the viewer's disappointment even greater as the story fizzles.

1 and 1/2 pieces of Southern Africa toast

New video and DVD

NEIL YOUNG: HEART OF GOLD (2006)

Neil Young, Emmylou Harris, Spooner Oldham, Ben Keith, Rick Rosas, Jimmy Sharp. Directed by Jonathan Demme.

Box Office: $1,660,898

Four days before an operation to repair a potentially fatal brain aneurysm, Neil Young heads to Nashville for a concert blending old songs and new with friends and family. Gives "Old Man Take a Look at My Life" a whole new meaning. Masterful concert footage makes this worth owning.

4 pieces of golden toast

DAVE CHAPPELLE'S BLOCK PARTY (R)

Dave Chappelle, Fred Hampton Jr. Directed by Michel Gondry.

Box Office: $11,694,528

Witty, honest, and very funny comedian Dave Chappelle wanders the back roads of his Ohio hometown handing out golden tickets for his Brooklyn block party where Lauren Hill takes the stage with the Fugees, where rap, funk and hip-hop make beautiful music together. A sleeper that delivers on several levels.

3 and 1/2 pieces of a'chapella toast

Pink Panther (PG)

Steve Martin, Beyonce Knowles, Jean Reno, Kevin Kline. Directed by Shawn Levy.

Box Office: $82,226,474

We learned from the Peter Sellers movie bio that he grew to hate the Inspector Clouseau role. They should have left well enough alone.

1 and 1/2 pieces of failed pratfall toast

AQUAMARINE (PG)

Emma Roberts, Joanna "JoJo" Levesque, Sara Paxton. Directed by Elizabeth Allen.

Box Office: $18,562,160

Just say the words "Swimming Pool Barbie" about this mermaid-out-of-water movie and you've said it all.

1 and 1/2 pieces of week-old tuna toast

16 BLOCKS (PG-13)

Bruce Willis, David Morse, Conrad Pla, Mos Def. Directed by Richard Donner with 18, that's right, 18 producers credited.

Box Office: $36,883,539

An "Assault On Precinct Outside" type of popcorn movie, it's an expertly crafted, violently butter-flavored topping for the kernels. Mos Def actually adds to the end product this time.

2 and 1/2 pieces of Willisesque toast

THE WORLD'S FASTEST INDIAN (PG-13)

Anthony Hopkins, Paul Rodriguez, Bruce Greenwood. Directed by Roger Donaldson.

Box Office: $5,022,468

This sleeper chronicles the unlikely last act of daredevil motorcycle speedster Burt Monro who set land speed records at the not-so-sprightly age of 68. Predictability plays as an asset with Anthony Hopkins on the hot seat.

3 pieces of sidecar toast

(Gil Mansergh's Cinema Toast mini-reviews appear in the Argus-Courier every week. E-mail comments to gilmansergh@comcast.net.)